Saturday, November 16, 2019

Middle Child Meltdown

This past week, three senior U.S. foreign service officers, all of whom had dedicated multiple decades to public service, testified before the House Intelligence Committee as the impeachment process entered its public phase. Not surprisingly, the one who most got under the orange skin of Cheeto Jesus was a woman. Ambassador Maria Yovanovitch who the U.S. Ambassador to Ukraine when the Donald and his fixer, Rudy "Clown Car Chaser" Guliani, decided to commit a few high jinx and muffled screamers.

His Rudeness, slithering through "diplomatic" back channels, would bring the full weight of the U.S. presidency onto the new Ukrainian president, Volodymyr Zelensky unless he publicly announced an investigation of Hunter and Joe Biden AND pursued the cockamamie, debunked conspiracy theory that it was Ukraine, and not Russia that interfered in the 2016 U.S. election. Were he to fail to do so then the U.S. would renege on its commitment to provide $400 million in military aid. It had all the hallmarks of the kind of scheme only the very best people with the biggest brains could pull off.

First, Rudicchio unleashed a slime campaign on Ambassador Yovanovtich. He eventually got U.S. Secretary of State, Mikey "Two Helpings" Pompeo, to curtail her tour. With her undermined and eventually out of the picture, Rudy, playing Moe to the other Three Stooges - Larry (Rick Perry), Curly (Gordon Sondland), and Shepp (Kurt Volker), went into overdrive to execute the Trump administration's extortion scheme. Not surprisingly, as we learn more, it's quickly become apparent that "only the very best people" managed to bungle their criminal scheme, practically handing, gift wrapped, to the Democrats all that they needed to make the case for impeachment a slam dunk.

When Ambassador Maria "Masha" Yovanovitch testified yesterday, she brought her A game, demonstrating what a consummate professional she is and how much she represents all that we aspire to be as Americans. Meanwhile little Donnie did what he always does. He plopped his prodigious backside on his gold-plated throne and unleashed a steady stream of sludge, tweeting furiously to further discredit and denigrate Masha, even as she delivered her testimony before the House Intelligence Committee.

The result? The world saw once again just how corrupt and constitutionally unfit Donald Trump is to hold any office besides assistant dog catcher. While Masha persevered and delivered her testimony with grace, determination and precision, Captain Chaos gave us yet another encore performance of "Meltdown of the Middle Child."

It had us all screaming for more, "Masha, Masha, Masha!"


Tuesday, November 5, 2019

The Sounds of Autumn

This past week, Autumn finally blew into Washington, DC. Temperatures have dropped a bit, the wind has picked up, and we all have had to scrape off the first frost from our windshields. And as the weather has grown cold, so the impeachment proceedings have really begun to hot up. Pretty soon we will be able to view these proceedings live, as the Democrats shift the impeachment to public hearings. No longer will we have to rely on leaks; everything will be broadcast for all to watch the spectacle in all of its...gory, sordid details.
Already a steady stream of administration witnesses have defied the White House's orders to resist Congress's subpoenas and have instead chosen to testify. These men and women of the U.S. civil and foreign service have admiringly chosen to remain true to their oath to the Constitution, putting country before some misguided loyalty to this corrupt regime. And, boy, has this pissed off the GOP and their demented, bloated pet orangutan. Not surprisingly, they have subjected these public servants to all manner of personal attack and smears, even making claims of dual loyalty against a decorated army veteran who earned a Purple Heart for his valor in the battlefield.
In fact, Trump and his merry band of GOP enablers have really had to strain to come up with new defenses for his indefensible behavior. The growing body of evidence collected by Congressional investigators has cut through most of them like a hot knife slices through rancid butter. No matter. The GOP simply goes back to dredge up another bucket of muck and then another and another, all from the mother lode of muck, a deep, thick vein of which seems to run straight through Trump's backside.
Do not despair. Instead just enjoy the brilliant foliage, the crisp air and sweet smell of fall leaves, slowing decaying and preparing the soil for rebirth and growth next spring. Hopefully, by then Trump will be enjoying his swamp-side villa in his new state of residence...under house arrest.